February Update
Weight (212) -5 lbs. since 1/1/24
Workout Days (13)
The response to this series has been beyond my wildest expectations. In the first few months of 2021, I felt tremendous support. As I moved through that year, 2022, and 2023, you kept reading and providing motivation. Because of you, I decided to continue journaling my journey toward a more improved image of my body. I am choosing to share this journey because my triumphs and struggles are not my own. I don’t know a single person who hasn’t struggled with their weight and self-confidence. For those who are just beginning this journey to those miles ahead of me, I want everyone who stumbles across this series to know they are not alone.
Weight Loss
I began 2024 with a simple wish. I wanted a more balanced diet. I didn’t want to punish myself for a sweet tooth or indulging in those foods we all know shouldn’t be at the center of our diets. I wanted to eat more fresh fruits and vegetables. I wanted to eat less carbs and fried foods. Nearly two months into the new year, I am down five pounds. I still have a long way to go to achieve my goal weight, but I find myself a little less fearful of the bathroom scale.
Diet
I often lose my weight loss battle in the kitchen. The thing I am trying to get better at is mindful eating. Eating without regard has so often kept me from reaching my goals. With everything I eat, I want to spend a moment thinking of the why. Why am I eating this? Am I bored? Craving something? Is this bringing me joy? Will it bring me closer to my goals? If I can get to a place where those answers are trending in a more positive direction, I feel confident I will inch toward a better diet.
Mental Health
Oddly, despite the struggles and challenges, I think I am arriving at a place of acceptance. I will never be as skinny as I was in high school. I will never be anyone’s source of muscular envy. Instead, I just want to be happy with the person staring back at me in the mirror. If he and I can find joy, my mental health should follow suit.
Workouts
I have fallen back in love with running. After a long absence from the sport, I decided to begin training for a half marathon. The last time I ran such a race was in my mid-twenties, but I remember those days fondly. With a race day marked on the calendar, I have discovered a new source of motivation. For months, I have been running and plan to run a race this summer. With every new starting line, I feel myself getting faster and stronger. When I think of working out, that’s all I desire.
Be good to each other,
Nathan
A Dream Realized (February 2024)
in Essays